shit we, you know, enjoy seeing

i've been making more of an effort lately to take pictures of things not at night. here are some things i was surprised and delighted to see either with my friends, alone, or on the street.

homeboy

[img cred: american apparel]

story time.

in new york, i've found, you will always be taken care of. last night, when walking home after a pretty crazy time dancing with friends, i stopped into the belgian fries place on seventh and a. i was wearing a cutoff tee shirt that exposed about an inch of my stomach in standing position and short, rolled up cutoffs. also hoping to get satisfaction via fried potatoes were some guidos from long island standing to the left of me. this is where my trouble started.

there were three guys, and one was particularly opinionated. he was short with glasses and had a thick, crass accent. after he ordered his fries he looked at me and said, "you get stopped in the street for lookin like that? that's indecent exposure." i was already in the mood for starting shit, but started slow and responded with, "yep, that's what happened." he mentioned something to his friend about how he "used to live in this neighborhood, and shit like this wouldn't fly back then. faggot," clearly not worried about me hearing.

i shot back with, "want a piece of this?" and grabbed my big gay cock. he responded with something very sixth grade about how he bet i had a small penis and i told him he still wanted to suck it. i pushed him, he pushed back. i brushed his face, he kicked me. i kicked him, and his friend got between us. at this point i had my fries but was ready to rip this motherfucker's head off. a group of people was gathering outside, naturally on my side since we were in alphabet city three days from the gay pride parade.

i got a little ways outside, one of the friends holding back the sphincter, when this tall, skinny black queen who must have been in his forties wearing short shorts and a green tank top grabbed my shoulder. "go home, eat your fries. this is new york city, someone's gonna get him sooner or later." i stopped and thought "he's right". there's nothing i could do that would make anything better at all. i left, and though i was seriously considering hiding around a corner with a rock to bludgeon the cunts, i didn't. i'm not saying that violence isn't the answer because i think it can be, and you have to learn to defend yourself and your beliefs physically and verbally. but the guy who pulled me away did allow me to walk away feeling validated because of the fact that i knew i was right, and everyone on the street knew i was right, and most of new york city knew i was right. it allowed me to walk away without any question that the harasser was a lunatic back woods faggot.


moral of the story, you will be taken care of.

i only wish i were a pool boy,

the best things in life are free, like bloody mary's with breakfast. it's genius until you're drunk at three...actually, it's still kind of genius. coco, james, and i all had brunch at schillers then met up with dana dawg g-steeze, who provided us with a lot of fun in the sun walking around her hood and trying on sunglasses.

then we went to a bbq at this awesome apartment, met up with matt, and decided to head to meatpacking for a pool party at the gansevoort hotel...or so we thought. they decided to get all beatrice on us and tell us we couldn't come in because it was three guys and two girls. shouldn't door guys have gotten the memo that that kind of attitude is so over? (even though it has never been cool, it's definitely time for it to stop.) and it's the middle of the fucking day, dude, you're not impressing anybody in the broad sunlight.

anyway, it wasn't a total waste. we took our pissed off asses to the piers and cooled off before heading our separate ways (creative/irreconcilable differences). chilled for a little bit at home, and while pulling images for this blog,came across the little (literally) ditty you're about to see from the-penis-website.com. warning, you may want to burn out your corneas before you scroll down.




it's a little tiny weeny!!!!! eeewww, that's not a weeny. not a legitimate one anyway.


moving on, i really like the new ad campaigns i've seen coming out. people are finally using models in them and not celebrities.

[img cred: thefashionspot]

i hated that marc jacobs collection, but natasha vojnovic's crazy ass looks mad good in the campaign. also using models are gucci, armani, prada, miu miu, dolce, givenchy, chloe, ect. however, celebs are inevitable, and madonna returns to vuitton (which i actually like), and connelly comes back for balenciaga (meh...i like her, but she's whatever in ads). hopefully the combo of this, and money crunches forcing magazines to put fashion models on the covers of fashion magazines (doutzen for bazaar subscriber, it's a start), will mark the downfall of obsession with nothing celebrities who've done nothing, and put more attention on hot models...who've done nothing.


i think that's it for tonight, but before i go, i have to remind you of two things. hunter parrish from weeds is hot (check out casperfan.blogspot.com for a full-montier shot like the one in the collage above), and gaga likes mini movies. i hope i didn't scar you with the non-penis.